Off The Duff.

I got off my duff, and by getting off my duff I mean The Renter kids, a.k.a. The Neighborhood Terrors, were taking a break indoors for once so I manually hedge trimmed those big, thorny barberries out front that I was whining about the other day. I manually clipped them because using the electric hedge trimmer draws unwanted attention. You see, whenever I try to work out in our own front yard, rocks and the like magically fly over into our yard from that direction, The Renters’ direction, because the kids are constantly outside and apparently have nothing better to do. Basically, to keep from getting hit, I choose not to work out there unless it’s a school day and then, only during morning hours due to the high number of half days our school system allows around here. School out for another month or so, hence, little yard work is being done out front.

Yes, I said rocks flying into our yard while I’m working out there. Doesn’t matter if I say anything. The kids tell their foster parents I’m lying and that’s where it ends. Well, other than the kids get a new bike or iPhone or something equally expensive because someone accused them of doing mean stuff and we all know gifts are the only thing that dries tears.

Yeah, I know. I KNOW!

So, six of nine shrubs have been hedge trimmed, four on The Renter’s side of our yard alone. Two of the three left won’t be tough to tackle at all; it’s just logistics and perfectly do-able at a moment’s notice (the next time that might happen).

The other, that six-foot burning bush, that’ll be the proverbial bitch. I’m not going to think about it right now. Just not gonna.

I got a few mosquito bites while I was out there. Completely my fault. It was that time of evening when mosquitoes are out more than not. And I was sweaty. Sweat equals mosquito love. One of the bites has got to be the biggest I’ve ever gotten, so if in about ten days I start feeling like crap, West Nile Virus. I know, don’t even joke about that. But damn, if those three shrubs don’t look much, much better and I’ll be sure to mention that from my death bed.